This post is a distillation of thoughts I've had whenever people mention my attitude to my leukaemia. It's lifted from an email to a friend
My take on the Positive Attitude thing.:
My take on the Positive Attitude thing.:
The truth is that there are assholes who survive cancer and wonderfully positive
people who don't make it. Certainly, attitude may have an effect on the way my
body handles chemo, and fights the disease, but it's definitely not *the* major
factor. However - my attitude does make
a *huge* difference to Deb and Kira, to my parents,
siblings, friends, and to the way the world in general (or at least that small
part of the world that knows I exist) deals with me.
I could spend my time and energy bitching about chance, fate,
leukaemia, doctors, chemo and the rest - but what a waste. It would just make
people round me miserable, and wouldn't change the facts of my disease. It's in
my own best interests to be cheerful, and concentrate my energies on the upside.
Apart from any undefined positive-feedback self healing benefits that may accrue
to my body, it also means that people approach me positively.
When I'm honest and upbeat I get smiles, hugs, help, love,
affection, compliments, and peoples honest interest - all things I thrive on.
Turning into a grouch would deprive me of those things, send people scurrying
away, and fill the air around me with anger and arguments - which have always
made me uncomfortable.
I know the type of interactions with people that make me feel
good, and I encourage the world to offer them to me. People enjoy being nice!
So I encourage them to be nice to me. The fact that we both walk away feeling
enriched is one of the greatest gifts human nature has to offer.
So, sure I have a positive attitude, but
ultimately its for my own benefit. We can't all be Buddhist saints, living a
life of compassion and dedicated to the service of others. In the world I
experience enlightened self interest has always seemed the right way to
go.
That's not to say I don't have bad patches. I have moments of
real grief and fear and rage about what's happening to me and what may happen in
the future. But those don't need to be broadcast to the world in general. They
stay close to home and I deal with them as they arise and fade away. Than I
carry on with the next moment in my day.
